Just a decade or so ago, drug tests were a fact of life when it came to employment. Big companies would routinely ask for a urine sample before officially hiring you – and if you didn’t pass, you wouldn’t get the job. But it’s a different time now, cannabis is legal in 11 states, and some companies are backing off on the mandatory testing.
Companies like PetSmart were known for their drug testing policies. But times change and so do they. Let’s take a look at where PetSmart currently stands when it comes to drug testing.
PetSmart’s Drug Test
So PetSmart is an American retail chain that sells pet products. So you know, dog and cat food, stuff for grooming, etc. They also offer small animals available for sale and adoption like fish, gerbils, hamsters, you get the picture. It’s your typical big business pet store, and for a while, if you wanted to get a job there, you had to pass a drug test.
If you got through your interview and got offered a job, you’d be instructed to report to a drug testing center within 48 hours and provide a urine sample for testing. What was nice about PetSmart’s protocol was that these urine drug tests were of the unsupervised variety. If you’ve ever done your research into passing drug tests, you’ll know how much of a lay-up this is. They’re practically asking you to cheat.
In any case, you’d hand in your sample, and it would be run through the most basic five-panel drug test. These test for the metabolites derived from cannabis, PCP, opiates, cocaine, and amphetamines. They run your sample through that, and they’ll inform your potential employer if you’re clean or not. If you pass that along with the background check, then you’ll get the job. Sounds good right?
There have been some changes to the way PetSmart conducts business these days, but for the sake of enlightening ourselves, let’s run through a quick list of the many ways you can pass this kind of urine test.
Passing a Urine Test
There are many, many ways to get through a urine test as lenient as PetSmart’s. We’ll give you a neat list here so you know your options.
The Natural Method
If you don’t do drugs, congratulations. You’re going to pass. If you do, there’s a chance you can get through with little effort if your intake is minimal. Fat-soluble chemicals like THC will get processed by the body on its own, so your job is to help it out as much as possible. Drinking lots of water, eating lots of fiber and lean meat, and getting in exercise will help your body work through those toxins and get them out of you. Just remember to not take in any new drugs as that will defeat the whole purpose.
Marijuana Detox Products
If you’re a bit of a heavier user but you still want to use your own actual pee, you might need to resort to the best THC detox kits like the one from Toxin Rid. Most operate the same way. You’ll take in a regimen of pills and drinks designed to help your body efficiently process THC and other drug metabolites. These accelerate your body’s capability to move these chemicals out of you, so you end up with pee that’s clean as a whistle.
If you’re planning to go this route, it’s best to prepare in advance. Most plans take a couple of days to work, and if you’re a heavy user, you may need something upwards of a week to get truly clean. Some detox programs “mask” your pee by bringing your metabolite levels down temporarily, but we suggest going with the safer option of just going clean.
Good ol’ fake piss. There are products on the market today that are basically indistinguishable from the real thing. Products like Quick Fix are so advanced that they’re actually used to calibrate urine testing equipment, so you’ll probably have little to no problems there.
Normally in a supervised test, you’d need some extra equipment like a specialized belt like Monkey Whizz for women or prosthetic like Monkey dong for men so that you look like you’re really peeing. But as we’ve mentioned earlier, PetSmart lets you take care of providing a sample unsupervised, which means you have all the time in the world to leisurely pour a cup of fake pee into a cup without any issue. Just make sure to get it up to temperature beforehand and you’re as good as gold.
PetSmart’s New Policy
For some reason in September of 2018, PetSmart updated its drug testing policy. Now, it does not require drug testing for pre-employment or internal promotions. That’s right folks, you don’t need to pass a drug test to get hired anymore. Before you start singing hallelujahs, it doesn’t mean you can show up to work high or anything. It just means they won’t actively check for your metabolite levels when you get interviewed, which is nice.
PetSmart hasn’t eliminated drug testing entirely however. If there is a workplace accident, they may test you to make sure you were sober on the job. They also reserve the right to give you a drug test at any time on the spot. This doesn’t mean you need to stop with the weed per se, just don’t be dumb and look high on the job. Keep your fun life and work life separate and they should have no reason to suspect you of anything.
We’ve come a long way. More and more, companies are seeing the light when it comes to casual, harmless drug use. More states are legalizing marijuana, and some of the smarter presidential candidates are advocating full legalization too. It’s still a fight though, and while companies like PetSmart are coming around, it doesn’t mean we should lay around and wait for them. Go out there and make yourselves heard.